As a mom of twins, I've gotten used to drawing lots of
attention whenever we go out. At the doctor's clinic, at restaurants, and even
in restrooms, people just come out of nowhere to ask "Are they
twins?" But even though people notice us all the time (we're pretty hard
to miss with the million stuff we're lugging around), there are times when I
can't help but feel invisible because people find it difficult to relate to my
experiences as a twin mom.
Having twins is hard. And I'm not even talking about the
high risk pregnancy and sleepless nights. I'm talking about the times when your
twins are "tandem crying" and you have to choose to soothe one over
the other. Those days when one twin is confined in the hospital and you and
your husband have no choice but to leave the other twin at home because the
sick twin needs you more. Or the times when you just feel like you're short-changing your kids because from day one, they had to share your attention.
Don't get me wrong, the double blessings of having twins is
not lost on me but there are times when twin parents just need to connect with
fellow twin parents who have experienced the same challenges and stresses. This
is why I was so happy when I heard that The Parenting Emporium was holding a
twin parent support group meeting last February 24.
It was great to meet parents from all stages of twin
parenting from expecting to new to experienced. I also finally met fellow twin
mommy Fran of Frannywanny.com. We both have boy-girl twins and have been online
friends since late last year swapping stories about our twin pregnancies and
twin parenting experiences.
The meeting was moderated by one of The Parenting Emporium's
founders, Beng Feliciano who has fraternal twin girls. The discussion was
informal and was mainly about sharing our own stories and tips. It was really
nice to hear stories from parents who are a few years further down the road
from me because they gave me hope. I was so happy to hear from Beng and another
mom that things got easier for them when their twins turned 3. Yay, only 2 more
years to go! It also felt great to share some hacks of my own (get a UV
sterilizer and 2 bouncy chairs!) to expecting twin parents.
But what I appreciated most about the group was that there
was no judgment despite our different parenting choices (cloth
diapers/disposable diapers, co-sleeping/no co-sleeping). Everyone was accepting
and encouraging and we all just got each other. We all understood the unique
joys and challenges that come with raising twins. It's just what every twin
parent needs - to be understood and to be seen.
I'm very happy I was able to attend The Parenting Emporium's
twin parenting support group meeting. It was a nice feeling to be surrounded by
people who are in the same boat as I am. And also, being able to share my
feelings about twin parenting reminded me how fortunate I am to experience the
unique journey that is twin parenthood.
No comments